THE CRAPPER SPEAKS
Thursday, August 03, 2006
...My brain popped in class just now. Literally. One minute I was fuming mad, the next minute my mind went blank. Not the kind of peaceful blank; the blurry darkness blank kind. Rollercoaster down after that. You know, the things which make me tick have changed. But today during class, I felt totally, utterly useless. I wanted to do something in class, but well, I guess it wasn't meant to be. I tried doing more work, but I couldn't help the feeling. How do you try to squeeze in against more vocal people?
So I went off early. Tell me if my early departure made a difference. Recently have been running on a short fuse. I never wanted all those boo-boos and failures, but I guess it's just a part of being human. Fallible. Its that realisation that's kept me sane for the week. But that's not to say things can't improve. And don't say I don't do anything. To put it crudely, I bloody well flung my comments in, but they weren't accepted.
Okay, so that's a little bit of frustration over the week that's been released. Over the course of the week, I kind of find these few things lacking whenever I want to do something:
1. Enough Information - I can't read peoples' minds and therefore cannot "know" without explanation and effective communication.
2. Practise/Time/Wadchamaycallit - Neither am I an overnight wonder performer. I need practice! I'm a theory-biased guy with a severe handicap in practical stuff. Can I do things the way I do best and not the way others do best?
Thank you very much for hearing me rant, but I really really needed to get these things through.
Psychedelic;
9:55 AM
